My Least Favorite Subject

I think I’ve said this before, but let me say it again, I hate being in front of the camera. I hate even seeing pictures of myself. It’s not that I so much mind being me, or that I really care that much, but faced with images of myself, I immediately pick out every flaw. I always wonder when my nose decided to get so big, and was it just so it could join my ass? Any time a camera is aimed at me, I feel completely ridiculous. I try not to, but I always have this deer in headlights look. I’m convinced these are some of the main reasons I love taking the picture. Now, imagine me taking on the project of a self portrait. Not only am I the photographer lacking the posing skills necessary, I’m the partly unwilling subject with no direction and little motivation and that special deer in headlights thing. If you want to get all truthful about it, the only reason I chose today as the day I would complete my self portrait project was that I had washed my hair and put on make-up. Let’s be honest, how often does that happen?? Oh, and do you know how hard it is to focus on a subject that isn’t there? Or how hard it is for a subject to focus on a photographer that isn’t there? Don’t worry, this won’t be a regular occurrence. Make-up and clean hair is something I’m willing to do without.